Gay Oreo
Hello, and welcome back to another issue. This issue will not be dealing with the opioid epidemic as my blog basically always does. This post I will be presenting you with an incredible piece written by a talented contributor Alan Smithee. I hope you enjoy.
I’m sure that I’ll say a couple things in this that’s going to upset people, and the first argument they’ll make is “Well you’re writing about it, so you’re also part of the problem.” And now, having undermined my entire argument with throwing my own logic back in my face, everything that I said that they didn’t like is now irrelevant and they can continue on with their day, reposting this to whatever site they choose because now they’ve reduced me and my points to being an argumentative Anakin.
This whole Gillette controversy is dumb. It is, quite honestly, another cog in the outrage machine that has been running for the past few years. About a month from now, this commercial will be like Asher Roth’s career: a lot of people swear that it’ll be a game changer in the moment, there will be no follow-up, and then after a while we’ll all just casually move on. Remember what happened with the Oreo Pride advertisement? You know, this one:
That was back in 2012. Does anyone remember the controversy that it sparked? Conservatives across the country came out in opposition of Oreo, saying they would never eat another Oreo ever again (which is honestly ridiculous because Oreo is milk’s favorite cookie). They commented everywhere they could in protest of Oreo. And the left laughed at them. Because how absolutely ridiculous could they be? Were they really, truly getting that upset over some colorful cookies? After all, who cares what two cookies do in the privacy of their own package? Guys, it’s just Oreos. Besides, welcome to capitalism, where companies can say and do what they want, and we vote with our wallets. So if you really want to be upset over something as ridiculous as a cookie, then be upset. But you’re being a child.
And then Chick Fil A happened. And apparently everyone forgot everything had said. Because now there was this massive liberal outcry in protest of Chick Fil A, swearing they would never eat at Chick Fil A ever again (which is ridiculous because it’s absolutely delicious). They commented everywhere they could in protest of Chick Fil A, but they also made sure to go out and protest, too. And the right laughed at them. Because how absolutely ridiculous could they be? Were they really, truly getting that upset over some chicken? And you get my point.
But here’s my other point. Every single person who just read this had different feelings. Some of you felt pride while reading about Oreo because it’s nice to see a big company stepping up in solidarity, while some some of you felt disgust or outrage that they felt the need to politicize themselves. Some of you felt a sense of solidarity with Chick Fil A because it’s nice to see someone standing up for what you also believe in, while some of you felt disgust that someone could ever excuse those kinds of beliefs. But all of you have exactly one thing in common: you refuse to talk to your disagreeing neighbor about why they feel the way they do.
You’ll argue with them, sure. But you won’t talk to them. You won’t listen to them. You’ve already decided that because they can think the way they do, they’re wrong and misguided (if not flat out stupid), and to try to educate them on why your beliefs are the way they are would be a waste of your time. And again, I’d be willing to bet those of you reading had a reaction to this. You already knew who I was agreeing and disagreeing with because I’m separating us into sides again, without me having to say anything. Keep reflecting your bias.
This is, in a lot of ways, what we’re dealing with now in regards to this Gillette commercial. So first of all, the commercial itself is just plain dumb. Anyone telling you it’s a good commercial has an agenda. Also, anyone telling you it’s biased also has an agenda. As far as actual advertising goes, the commercial is so self-aggrandizing and pompous that you have to wonder how they managed to balance a pedestal atop a soapbox atop a high horse, and truly commend them for their ability to balance. You watch that commercial, and you can feel everyone involved was only working with their non-dominant hand.
At no point in this commercial for razors do I see a razor. Go ahead, tell me it’s about more than razors. In which case, why do they end it with the Gillette logo? Why did I just watch an almost 2-minute long commercial for razors where I don’t ever see a razor? That’s just poor advertising.
Let’s talk about some dialogue from this commercial:
● “We believe in the best in men.” Sounds good. Appreciate the vote of confidence, my trust razor.
● “To say the right thing. To act the right way.” I’m feeling a lot of pressure from my razor.
● “Some already are in ways big and small.” Huh. I’m pretty optimistic my razor believes in me.
● “But some is not enough.” Did my razor just tell me that only some men are good? Doesn’t that mean that most men are trash? Is my razor shit-talking me?
● “Because the boys watching today will be the men of tomorrow.” Holy shit that was cliche.
I can understand both points here. While this is a pretty dumb commercial for a razor, it’s an incredible political narrative. It says just enough that it stirs trouble, while still making sure to have an overall uplifting vibe. It’s written in a way where you can’t criticize it without outing yourself as being part of the problem. After all, how can you criticize their viewpoint. They didn’t say all men are the problem. In fact, they acknowledged that there are some good ones out there, and that they as a razor company are here to believe in the best of us. So if you have any issues with this commercial, guess what? You’re not part of the “some”. And that closing line, my goodness. Someone got paid a lot of money to take a super generic “what is today is not tomorrow” outline, interject the point of the ad, and then sit back in their chair and congratulate themselves on not letting their arts degree go to waste. I can understand, from a male perspective, being upset about this advertisement. It isn’t exactly manipulative, but it’s definitely tricky.
However, I can understand from a female perspective thinking male outrage over this is ridiculous. And to be fair, we really have just been giving this thing way too much attention. But it’s insane to get so upset about this. If this ad bothers you, then don’t buy Gillette products. No need to make a big show of it, just do it. But if it bothers you that an ad is pointing out that hey, we can all always be better, then yeah, maybe it’s time to work on yourself a little bit more than dusting the daily Cheeto’s crumbs off your shirt and calling it a shower.
Honestly, I can’t even remember what my point was anymore. I was so annoyed about this that I just needed to get it out, I needed to say something. And now I’ve gotten myself so worked up I can’t even remember what it was that was bothering me. Maybe this was all just a waste of my time. Maybe I had no point, and my attention would be better served focusing on something more real world and tangible. Oh, right.
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